Wednesday, April 18, 2012

A Letter to Baby Bee: 35 Weeks and it's getting hot in here


Dear Baby Bee,
At 35 weeks pregnant, your due date is sneaking up. I can now tell people that I'm having this baby next month. I'm beginning to wonder if sleeping on my stomach was really as amazing as I remember. Walking around with a space heater strapped to my abdomen, I am starting to see why all pregnancies must come to an end. It wasn't that long ago that I would have wanted to stay pregnant forever. But even my most roomy maternity clothes, the ones I thought would never fit, are now even becoming a little snug. It feels like you are growing bigger by the minute, your movements becoming stronger and more deliberate than ever, sometimes they literally take my breath away. All of these are good signs that soon we will meet.

It's best that I concentrate on the meeting you part, rather than the getting you out part. Because, HOOEY! how that is all going to happen is one big giant mystery that I can't yet comprehend. We took a Childhood Preparation class at the hospital. I've been reading all I can about labor and delivery. I've been asking everyone I know to share their own experiences. But even still, I'm not sure there is anything that can really prepare me. It's both terrifying and exciting all at once. We have faith it will work out in the end. Things generally do.

We've been working feverishly on preparing your nursery - with lots of help from Aunt Jen - and making sure it's just right. This is mostly for my benefit rather than for yours, but for some strange reason it feels really really important that it gets done. The room is bright and cheery; it's our favorite place in the house to be. Now, when your dad comes home he knows to find me in the nursery instead of the kitchen or living room. We can hardly walk past your room without stepping into it and running a hand over the crib rail. It sounds silly, but trust me, this is all very exciting for us.

While my nesting instinct keeps getting stronger and stronger, your dad has patiently been working through the endless honey-do lists I make for him. Just when he gets through with one, I've added more things to another. He's adamant that you are able to recognize his voice after you are born, so every night he's been picking out a book or two to read out loud. Lately, it's been all about Dr. Seuss. It's just the two of us in the room but there he is doing all the animal sounds and funny character voices. I'm unbelievably grateful that I have the chance to see this "daddy mode," a side of him I never expected. Everyone says it just keeps getting better. Little girls need great daddies, and while I'm obviously partial to him already, I think  you've got the very best.

Even with 5 weeks (+/-) left to go, there is still plenty that we need to do in preparation for your arrival. We have lots of fun to look forward to as well with upcoming baby showers and hopefully a pedicure or two for mom. The other night we attended the Salt Lake Temple with Grandpa and all of your Duncan aunts and uncles. You were highly active during the whole session - even getting hiccups toward the end - before you must have exhausted yourself completely and dozed off. I kept having the feeling again and again that you are, and will continue to be, the greatest joy of my whole life.

Love,
Momma

8 comments:

C*K*J said...

Without fail, I'm always wiping away tears at the end of these letters.
Love you so much!!

Ryan+Michelle+Ellie said...

good, i'm glad I am not the only one crying. geeeeze! I loved this post.

Alex said...

This is so so sweet. I hope this baby has books of love letters to read by the time she is able too.

I have to say Yes sleeping on your stomach really does feel That good. I remember just rolling over in my hospital bed and feeling extremely giddy about it. And I loved your labor thoughts. I thinks it's about 35 weeks where I feel ridiculously cornered and trapped. Panicked thoughts. There's only one way out of this!!!! And it's pushing!! Oh crap!"

j e s s i e said...

Im smiling from the inside out.

Elizabeth Madsen said...

So, so sweet. You could not have said it more beautifully. :)

Marc and Lindsay Duncan said...

can't wait to meet this baby girl. She must be the most loved fetus ever!!! So happy for you two. Love your baby bump. And those girlie clothes melt my heart. LOVE!!!!!!!!!

Lacy said...

I remember walking in the door from the hospital and going straight to my bed and laying on my stomach for a long time! Agh....it is as nice as you remember!

Whitnée said...

I am so excited for you G. :)