Monday, February 27, 2012

On Infertility: The IVF Process Part IV

While I'm traveling Down Under I thought I'd post some excerpts from my IVF Journal. Even at this early stage, it was irresistible not to think I was already experiencing every pregnancy symptom know to woman. Isn't it funny how that happens? I remember those two weeks being every so excruciating. It's like waiting for Christmas, only 1 million times worse. You know what I mean ;). The results either way would change me forever. 

The Waiting Game 4/7/11
  
Our pregnancy test is scheduled for Tuesday, which is still 5 days from now. It feels like torture. It might as well be 10 light years away. I’m at work and I can see the projects piling up on my desk like little evil minions pulling me in every other direction. But my mind is somewhere else completely. My mind is daydreaming. Nothing seems more important. We are so close. I try very hard to not let my mind wander to worrying places. 

“Worrying doesn’t delete tomorrow of its challenges, it only drains today of its strength.” 

I say, I don’t have time for you, worries; I have much better things to think about. Like whether or not I’ll get morning sickness or be able to see my toes soon or how long I am able to hide a baby bump from coworkers. It’s rainy today and every so often the thunder booms and I turn around in my chair to peer outside my big office window. I have a beautiful view from my office. But I’m hoping for a new one that can blink back at me. I have a song in my heart today, it has no words, but I’m tapping my foot and humming right along.

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